Killings: Mushroom Style
by Scratch
Summary: Bowser and Toad team up to battle one of the many evils of the Mario universe...


Killings: Mushroom Style  
By: Scratch  
  
Author's Note: This story's idea belongs to Porkey Chops, and I thought he   
deserved recognition for it. Thank him for the awesome idea, and I hope you   
all enjoy the fic! -Scratch ^..^  
  
One day, Bowser was having a good time as usual at the comic book   
store flipping through back issues of X-Men. He was enjoying an especially   
good X-Men when he saw, standing near him... TOAD!!! Bowser groaned. He was   
sick of the little mushroom-head, and it was so hard to be polite to the guy.   
He decided to just ignore him and go back to reading X-Men when someone came   
into the store. It was... oh no! Peach! She sauntered into the shop with her   
ugly pink dress and crown. She narrowed her eyes and looked about the shelves   
of comics for a minute. Then she walked, somewhat defiantly, up to the   
counter.  
  
"Don't you have anything suitible for MY reading purposes here?" she   
asked the guy behind the counter.  
  
"Well... uh... What did you have in mind?" he asked.  
  
"Something besides these... immature comic books," she said.  
  
"Well, this IS a comic book store. If you want a better selection go   
to a real book store or the library," said the guy.  
  
"Don't you know I'm too lazy for that?! I'm a princess. I want   
everything handed to me on a silver platter!" she snapped.  
  
Bowser saw Toad look up from his Batman comic and sigh.   
  
"That princess...," muttered Toad.  
  
This suprised Bowser. Toad? Mad at the princess? Impossible! Why,   
the little guy worked for her!  
  
"What about her, Toad?" Bowser asked.  
  
"Huh?" Toad said, confused. "Oh, it's you. Well, as hard as it may   
be to believe, Peach really pisses me off sometimes."  
  
"Really? Wow," Bowser said. "Ha, I guess now you know why I'm always   
capturing her for my own evil little purposes."  
  
"You know? I envy you. Sometimes I wish I could be evil, too. I get   
sick of being a goody two-shoes all the time. Especially to protect someone I   
don't even like that much!" Toad said.  
  
"Now this is a side I've never seen of you before. Well, I've   
got a plan..." said Bowser and motioned for Toad to come over to him. He   
whispered Toad his plan. Toad grinned evilly and said, "Let's do it!"  
  
Bowser lumbered over to the counter and to the employee's surprise,   
lifted Peach off her feet.   
  
"HEY!!! What are you doing?! I'm not finished whining yet!" Peach   
screeched.  
  
"Uh...," Bowser said to the employee, "I'm sorry about this, but I   
have to take my... *gulp* ...girlfriend home." Bowser shuddered at the idea   
of having Peach as his girlfriend.  
  
"Uh, sure, fine," the employee stammered, glad to be rid of the   
princess.  
  
"Yeah, well... Come on, Toad!" Bowser said in the calmest voice he   
could manage.  
  
"Coming!" said Toad, and the threesome hurried out of the shop.  
  
* * * * * *  
  
Toad, Bowser, and Peach arrived at Bowser's evil den-lair.   
  
"I'll show you to your... room!" yelled Bows', and he threw Peach   
into a small wooden cage and locked the door.  
  
Meanwhile, Peach was hollering her lungs out.   
  
"You guys better let me out! I am the princess! HOW COULD YOU DO   
THIS TO ME!!??? TOAD!!!! WHY??!!"  
  
"Well, Peach, I have protected you and been your servent for so   
long, putting up with your prissiness. And I got nothing for it! So, if you   
can clean up your attitude, we can put this nonsense behind us," Toad said   
calmly, and smiled infuriatingly.  
  
"PRISSY???!!!! I AM NOT PRISSY. AND YOUR THE ONE THAT'S   
NONSENSE!!!!" Peach screamed, and began to throw the trash, debris, and who-  
knows-what-else that was on her cage's bottom at Toad.  
  
Toad said, "Well, you asked for it," and pointed at Bowser, who was   
standing in the dark corner grinning his sharp, shiny teeth with glee. His   
reptillian eyes glinted menacingly.  
He stomped over and in a few earth-rattling strides he had reached   
Peach's cage. She stared up at him, open-mouthed, until she realized she was   
showing her fear. Her pride kicked in and she crossed her arms and closed her   
eyes in defiance.   
Bowser lifted her cage with his clawed hands, and then smashed it   
quickly to the ground. Peach's blood-curdling cry was heard for the last   
time.  
Toad cheered, and Bowser roared in delight. They gave eachother   
high-fives and then Toad said, "Why don't you come back to my place and we   
can grab something to eat? I'm starved."  
  
"Yes, that's a great idea. That experience did leave me a bit   
famished," Bowser said, and flashed his teeth again.  
  
So the two heroes of the Mario-Universe left Bowser's den, and this   
time, in satisfaction!  
  
THE END  
  



End file.
